Sanity Saving Tips for New Moms
Little can adequately prepare us for the change in our family that comes with the addition of a child. Caring for that little one is a 24-7 responsibility to which everything else takes second place - particularly during the first years. And becoming a new parent is always fraught with at least some level of insecurity - Will I be able to handle it all? Thus, getting organized prior to the birth of a little one is essential. It helps avoid feelings of frustration and inadequacy that so many of us experience, often tainting a bit of the joy in those first few weeks following such a huge life change. Following are some sanity saving tips that just might help you stay on top of everything life is throwing at you as a new mom.
- Get your house in order. Whether adopting or giving birth, clean out those closets and cupboards you were meaning to get to, rearrange the furniture and have that garage sale. You won't have time to get to these things for quite a while after the child arrives, and not having the time will make them all the more frustrating. So take care of those honey-do lists in advance.
- If you are going back to work, line up child care. Choosing the right person to take care of your child is an imperative, and doing so prior to the birth of your baby can take a lot of the pressure off.
- Interview pediatricians. Your child will likely visit them several times during his or her first year. Your healthcare provider should be someone you trust; someone who is responsive to your input; someone with whom you can form a collaborative relationship. You should also be comfortable with the office staff and partners. This is an important choice to make, so interview several providers and make this choice before your baby comes home.
- Discuss parenting philosophies with your spouse. Do we prefer attachment parenting for our child? What is the definition of a secure baby? What kind of schedule would work best for us? Will one of us stay home while one of us works? Or will we both work? Will our baby be breastfed? Will we feed on demand or on schedule? What role will spirituality and faith play in our child's and our family's life? Who will we allow to baby-sit? All of these seemingly simple decisions can become overwhelming when parents disagree - particularly after the baby is born. So talk about it and decide in advance then anticipate adjustments after the baby arrives!
- Stock your cupboards and freezer. While you will look forward to getting out and about after the baby is born, you will still be developing a schedule with him or her, and shopping and cooking might fall by the wayside and/or become a source of frustration. Stock up on the essentials in advance, and make a few casseroles and put them in your freezer or check out one of those food prep kitchens. It will help you feel organized and more in control in those first couple of weeks. Invest in a crockpot.
- Arrange for some help. Whether it is your parents, your in-laws, other family members, or some friends, arrange for a bit of assistance those first few weeks. From running errands to just bringing over a dinner, this help can be invaluable. When people offer, take them up on their generosity!
- Prepare yourself emotionally to be totally focused on your baby. Go beyond just bonding. Allow yourself the joy of new parenthood untainted by the guilt of not getting enough done. There will be plenty of time for it all later! Take this time to get inspired about assuming the mantle of motherhood!
A former preschool director, pediatric health educator and pharmacy consultant, Adelaide Zindler has contributed to ABC and Fox News, and been interviewed on radio shows throughout the country.