Just One Thing …
No one imagines the whole parenting gig will be easy. In fact, most of us anticipate long days, longer nights and moments when up is down and sideways is straight. But even the most prepared parents can’t know the true weight of parenthood until it’s squarely resting upon their shoulders—pressing down and seemingly refusing to let up. Parenting can make you feel super strong and proud one moment and then knock you down to nothing 30 seconds later. It’s easy to get sucked into the rinse, lather, repeat cycle of it all.
If this describes you, I have an assignment for you. Today, pick just one thing to make you feel like a better, more relaxed parent. Just for today. I’ll even give you a list of choices. Pick one, any one. Or pick two if you’re feeling saucy. And remember that if this parenting thing were easy, the bookstore wouldn’t be filled with a self-help section dedicated to parents.
Take a nap
No, not a “rest your eyes” and think about how much time you have before the buzzer on the dryer goes off. I mean an under the covers, lights out, sound machine on, N-A-P. Make it at least 30 minutes. Sleep is the number one thing every parent on earth is lacking—but not you today. Today you are taking a nap. Enjoy it.
Stop clipping coupons
I know, I know. Coupons save you money and every little bit helps. But not today. Today you are putting away the promo codes and ceasing to scour the internet for the store that has deli meat for $1.00 less. Just stop for today. Get gas without looking at the price. Buy the expensive teeny cookies at the little boutique shop. Add the cold foam to your coffee.
Eat breakfast
Food is not your enemy; it is your energy. And you are a crabby cake without it. So just today, take 10 minutes and make yourself a decent breakfast. Fruit, oats, maybe even an egg or two. Get some protein and some carbs and a little bit of fat and watch your day—and your parenting—improve dramatically.
Forgive your parenting past
You have made mistakes. The ghosts of parenting past pop up into your consciousness at the most inopportune times, reminding you that maybe you aren’t any good at this gig. Forget them. Today is new and you have a clean slate. Let go of anything holding you back and move forward. Onward.
Make the call
You have people in your life that want to help you be a better parent. Pick up your phone and call one of them today. Ask for advice on something that’s been bugging you, or a problem you just can’t quite solve. Listen to what they say and thank them. The benefits will be two-fold: They will be thrilled you asked, and you will receive a new lens and perspective to tackle your day. Win win.
Buy yourself flowers
Find the biggest, boldest, most beautiful bouquet of flowers you’ve ever seen and bring them home. Remind yourself that you are doing hard things every day and coming out successful on the other side. You are raising amazing human(s) and you deserve to be celebrated.
Buy yourself chocolate
Same thing as above, but maybe flowers aren’t your thing, so get chocolate instead.
Say it out loud
We have inner thoughts in our head that we keep quiet. Maybe it’s the fact that we don’t feel supported by our partner. Perhaps we really need someone to finally clean the guest room toilet because we are so sick of doing it. Just for today, say those thoughts out loud. We always tell our children to “use their words.” Today, you need to do it, too.
Go to a movie
Much like the nap, you don’t get to cheat here. None of the old “put a movie on while folding laundry and cleaning the living room” nonsense. Not today. Drive to a theater, get a huge tub of popcorn, turn your phone off and watch the movie you want to see from beginning to end. It will feel so naughty in the absolute best way.
Take yourself to lunch
Or dinner or breakfast. Drive to a restaurant, get a table for one and enjoy a meal with your thoughts. I will allow you to peruse your phone, but you can’t be shopping for groceries or filling out summer camp forms for your kids. Instead, read about celebrity gossip or plan your next beach vacation, even if it’s 10 years away. Maybe even buy yourself a new outfit. Make the entire meal about you.
Breathe
Of all the ideas on this list, this could be the hardest. Take five minutes today to simply sit … and breathe. Feel your breath in through your nose and back out through your mouth. It will be familiar because it’s exactly what you teach your child to do. Breathing will re-center you and remind you how to be present and focused.
Tell your kids you love them
I have no doubt you do this every day. But today, make sure they really hear it. Kneel in front of them and look into their eyes. Tell them you are so grateful to be their parent and they are the most important thing in your life. Finish it off with a hug where you don’t let go first—and voila! I guarantee you will both spend the whole day walking on air.
Five Super Fast Ways to Be a Better Parent Today:
- Say, “That’s okay, mistakes happen,” when you get cut off in traffic. Your kids will hear it and they’ll be kinder humans.
- Take your kids out of school 15 minutes early to get ice cream. Yes, that’s right. Ice cream in the middle of the afternoon.
- Put an “I LOVE YOU” note in your child’s lunch box.
- Read your child a book before bed. You’ve meant to do it the last three nights and haven’t. Tonight’s the night.
- Give your child extra dessert. For no reason at all.
Kim Antisdel is a freelance writer and interior design sales rep for KC. She lives in Liberty with her husband, stepdaughters and son.