We are inundated with more information than we can take in and are stretched by adapting daily. Below are a few of the best resources I have seen and tips I hope will encourage you at this time.
- Communicate openly, but don’t overexplain. If we are overwhelmed with the amount of information coming at us, how do our kids feel? We can limit what our younger children hear and help our teens set limits about how much information they seek (and model the same ourselves). However, don’t try to avoid conversations with your kids either. If they don’t have information from you, they will fill in the gaps themselves, often with scenarios that are much scarier than reality. Let their questions guide you in how much to say and in what detail. Questions will let you know what they are thinking and what they are ready to hear.
- Pray. Be mindful of how you pray for protection. Praying with our kids very specifically for protection. God always hears our prayers, especially in our most desperate times. Model praying to God. Be careful of the level of detail when praying with your kids.
- Keep adult conversations to adults. Our homes are not that big and, with community events on hold, many of us will be with our kids more than ever at a time when there is more to figure out with our spouse than ever before. Be mindful of what kids may overhear as you problem-solve, pray together, comment on the news, or share your fears. All of those pieces are necessary for our own health and to care for our kids- they just don’t need to be a part of it.
- Find limited social connections. Social isolation is never good for our emotions and mental health. In this time of social distancing (one professional listserv called it “compassionate spacing!”) try to connect with one or two other families. That way, exposure is limited while we strengthen relationships in our Body and our kids can play with “new” toys for a while. Use your judgment but consider the risk of totally isolating as much as you consider the risk of not. If you visit, make sure you and your kids scrub your hands for 20 seconds in soap and water as you enter and leave someone’s home.
- Keep a consistent schedule and routine. Many of us are pretty much recreating one from scratch. That is an opportunity! What is most important in your family? What are the skills you want to teach? Verses to learn? Home projects to complete? Historical topics to research together? Try to help kids get up, go to bed, and have meals about the same time each day. Complete schoolwork, go outside, etc., in a pattern. There is much our kids cannot anticipate and this is a way to help their worlds be more predictable. It helps kids behave better too!
I have looked at a LOT of resources collected by my child psychologist colleagues and below are my favorites: The CDC has good guidance for talking to kids of any age. PBS targeted talking with preschoolers and younger school-aged children.
“When you hear of wars and uprisings, do not be frightened. These things must happen first, but the end will not come right away.” Then He said to them: “Nation will rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom. There will be great earthquakes, famines and pestilences in various places, and fearful events and great signs from heaven.”- Luke 21:9-11
The LORD reigns, he is robed in majesty; the LORD is robed in majesty and armed with strength; indeed, the world is established, firm and secure. Your throne was established long ago; you are from all eternity. - Ps 93:1-2