Did you know that spending time with your baby develops appropriate relationships, empathy and self-esteem? “[One-on-one time] makes the kid feel cherished, loved, acknowledged and understood,” explains Dr. Celeste Frank, a psychologist with more than 20 years of experience counseling parents and children.
Frank suggests one hour as the ideal amount of time spend each day, one-on-one, with your child, “I know that is really hard to do, but if you could even get in half an hour or 45 minutes where you’re not doing anything else, you’re not cleaning the house or cooking or answering the phone, that would be ideal.”
Don’t have an hour each day? Consider incorporating quality time with your child while accomplishing daily chores.
Use these suggestions for fun convenient ways to bond with your young one.
- Let your child take charge. Children live in a world that is governed by adults. Allow your child to make the rules (within reason) while you play along without correcting or criticizing. You will be pleasantly surprised with your child’s vivid imagination, and you may find a bit of your inner child as well.
- Share a meal. Studies indicate that children who eat meals with their parents are much less likely to develop substance abuse problems and eating disorders. Eating together also opens the lines of communication. Be creative when engaging children in conversation by asking them specific questions about their day; for example, “What was the worst thing about your day?” You can also involve children in mealtime preparations as a cook or kitchen helper. Request input about upcoming meals, discuss favorite activities, books or upcoming family events at the table and remember to allow kids to ask you questions, too.
- Take a walk. Taking a walk with your child provides an opportunity for uninterrupted communication. Enjoy moving along at your child’s pace, noticing the things he sees and examines along the way. “Cultivate an open attitude toward your kid where you’re just going to listen. Kids will talk endlessly if they have the arena to do so,” says Frank.
- Cook together. Invite your child into the kitchen for measuring, stirring and recipe reading. Cooking together allows your child to feel involved in meal preparation while learning measurements and following directions.
- Star gaze. Choose an evening for your child to stay up past her bedtime so that you can star gaze together. All you need is a blanket and a cloudless sky. Enjoy gazing silently into the night sky, providing your child with ample opportunity to ask questions and share thoughts.
- Establish a ritual. Provide security and structure for your child by establishing rituals. “[Children] need to know that everything else is taken care of and just expand their endlessly curious minds. If their lives are chaotic and they don’t have routine, structure, rituals, then they can’t do that,” explains Frank. A ritual can be as simple as a bedtime routine, sharing a secret handshake before school or saying prayers together each night.
- Have fun. Spending time with your child allows you to see the person inside that small body you created. It also provides an opportunity to relax and see the world from a child’s perspective. Blow bubbles, examine bugs and play games together. Challenge yourself to relinquish your worries long enough to laugh with your child.
Julie Steed enjoys writing about parenting, fitness and her adventures as an Air Force spouse. She has lived in Leavenworth and many other U.S. cities.