The other day, after I put my one-year-old down for his nap, I wanted to seize the moment with my 3-year-old and work on some skills. It's no secret that more than one child in the family divides your time, and there has been some "mommy guilt" that has accompanied my thoughts lately. The guilt goes something like this: I feel guilty that my 3-year-old has to wait sometimes because I am changing the baby's diaper; I feel guilty that we can't work on skills like I'd like us to (sounding out letters to make words, number quantity, etc); I feel guilty that we can't always practice riding your bike outside since I can't just plop your brother in the grass for 15 minutes (of course he would never stay in one place). Sound familiar?
This is part of having more than one child. I know that; I realize that; at times, I even understand it. But the feelings of guilt do occasionally creep in, and I have to remind myself that my 3-year-old is learning some great lessons through these times. Sharing, patience, turn-taking, serving others before herself, and recognizing the world does not revolve around her. Tough lessons for a 3-year-old, but vital ones to learn.
As I began this article, I mentioned how I wanted to "seize" the moment with my 3-year-old when the baby went down for nap. This is a great time for Moms to do "bigger kid" activities. You don't have a little one that needs to be held, or cries for no reason, or (you fill in the blank). I looked at my daughter and said, "Let's practice writing your name!" with such excitement in my voice. Without skipping a beat, she very directly said, "I don't want to practice writing my name." Shocked and stunned, I wondered what could possibly be more thrilling than practicing writing. "I want to be a princess. You can be the queen and I can be the princess." I prodded again to see if the whole princess thing was just a fluke, and that she really actually did want to practice letters instead. Nope! Not for a second!
In the end, I did seize the moment. We played queen and princess, and I'm quite confident that she gained much more from that time than she would have during any forced letter writing session. There is always time to practice letters. But their time to play and pretend, dream and believe, and their desire to play with YOU may not always be there. Eventually, our kids grow up, they know how to write their letters and now their passing notes in class. Seize the moment today, let them be kids, and enjoy the moment with them. Pretend. Be the queen or king of the castle. You'll never regret it.