Sleep when baby sleeps is one of the most transferred pieces of advice given to moms-to-be. In the last weeks of my pregnancy, I envisioned the long naps my newborn would take. I thought, “I’ll sleep when he naps, do laundry and write thank you notes, and I’ll be able to establish some form of normality as we adjust to our new addition.” Never did I think my bundle of joy wouldn’t nap.
For the first month, I allowed him to sleep anywhere: in the swing, car seat, on the couch (nestled in between pillows), my arms, hoping that his body would fall into its own unique sleeping pattern. Sadly, that was never established, and his routine became six or seven 20-minute naps occurring sporadically throughout the day. For the next month, we tried every soothing product and routine. We tried “crying it out;” I talked to girlfriends, read books and consulted with my pediatrician. I began to identify his inability to sleep past 45 minutes as the “45 minute intruder,” and while I wish there was a special process that could ease the defeat and frustration a mother feels, I can offer some helpful suggestions from other moms and experts that may make the journey easier.
The “45 minute intruder” is a term used to label the action of a baby stirring after just 30-45 minutes of sleep time. Because babies sleep in cycles throughout the day, it is important they learn how to self soothe themselves back to sleep. Many parents mistake this awakening as baby’s being ready to get up. Instead of taking her out of her crib, pat or shush her or replace her pacifier.
Routine
Establishing a routine will allow your baby to know what to expect throughout the day, and it will also let you know when he is supposed to eat, nap, play and do tummy time. “What’s important is to implement a routine with your baby’s natural sleep cycle. You can’t force a child to nap just because a mother wants her child on a specific schedule,” says Dr. Stephen J. Lauer, PHD, pediatrician from University of Kansas Hospital in Kansas City, KS. Naps should start around the same time, and the number of naps should be the same every day. Plan on cutting out little day trips and setting aside at least two weeks to develop a healthy sleeping routine.
Make Observations
Is your little one tired or too tired? Hungry? While these are questions you ask yourself all day, they are important to ask right before naptime. Janie Woods, KCMO mother of 15-month-old twins, says, “I learned to really watch Kensie and Cooper’s cues, and when one yawned or rubbed their eyes, I put both of them down. I played a lullaby CD and turned on a sound machine for each nap.” Don’t wait too long before you put your little one down for a nap; you have a window of opportunity where he will go to sleep quickly and easily. Keeping your baby up for longer amounts of time will not necessarily lengthen his nap but might make it harder for him to fall asleep.
Set the Mood
Play a soothing CD, give a massage or read. Whatever comforts or soothes your little one will encourage a peaceful and restful nap. This will unwind and relax her, while letting her know naptime is here. “My son knows when it’s naptime I put on his lullaby CD, and when I lay him in his crib, he’s the one telling me ‘night, night,’” says Elizabeth Herrera, mother of 17-month-old Mark.
While it can be frustrating to create a naptime schedule, keep in mind the sooner you start implementing a routine into your baby’s life, the happier the entire family will be.
A Belton resident, Jennifer Duxbury can finally get stuff done around the house now that her 1-year-old son takes two long naps during the day!