Remember taking long walks, uninterrupted conversations about nothing in particular, and a time when your marriage included romance and fun? For many new parents, dating and having fun with your spouse can quickly take a back seat to diapers, late night feedings, and household chores. It’s easy to get wrapped up in the new baby and let fun and romance drift to the wayside, but it doesn’t have to be that way.
I remember well the “dream” of regular date nights before our first daughter was born. Prior to children, date night was easy. Theater, movies, concerts, art walks, we didn’t mind spending our weekend on leisure activities and fun. Then, baby comes and our focus is pulled. When you’re tired, it’s hard to think of creative ideas for a night out and the motivation to find a sitter you trust can be hard to muster just so you can get out and “do something.”
Finding a Sitter You Trust
You may be fortunate to have nearby relatives or close friends you can trust, but even then, you may not want to take advantage of their schedules. If you don’t have family in town or you’re the first in your circle of friends to have children, it can be tough. Think outside the box and watch for potential sitters in your congregation, or look for recommendations from other moms at library storytime or a parenting group, or ask co-workers for a suggestion, or you may want to try a local nanny agency where you can hire nannies who have been through a background check process. If you’re still struggling to find the right sitter, remember the option of the Home Date after the baby is in bed:
- Cook Together. Try a new recipe that requires more effort… i.e. sushi or flambé.
- Do Projects Together. Make something for your children (i.e. assembling Christmas or Birthday gifts).
- Jigsaw Puzzles & Games.
- Picnic on the Floor.
- Read Together or Watch DVDs.
- Taste Test Food. Buy samples of new foods (i.e. olives and cheeses) or a local ethnic grocery and taste a little of each food and compare notes to discover new faves.
Beating Exhaustion and Fatigue
In those B.C. (Before Children) year of your life, date night typically meant a Friday night on the town into the wee hours of the morning. Now with the exhaustion of late night feedings, 9 o’clock seems late. But, who says a date needs to start at 8pm on a Friday? Consider a Saturday morning matinee, brunch at a favorite restaurant, visit to the local Farmers’ Market, tour a museum, or go shopping. Considering alternate times for date night may even make it easier to find a sitter if your trusted caregiver tends to have evening plans.
Overcoming Distractions to Plan a Great Date
Okay, you want to go out and you have a sitter, but you don’t have any idea what you want to do. You aren’t familiar with any new releases at the movie theater that aren’t animated and you haven’t had time to read a newspaper in months. Having reservations, tickets, or a fun idea in place will help you to keep your commitment to go out and have some fun.
The Family Budget…
Let’s face it, new babies aren’t free and no matter how many shower gifts you receive it does bring an added expense to the family budget. Perhaps you’re feeling the strain and date night seems to fall under that “want/entertainment/we don’t really need it” category making it one of the easiest expenditures to eliminate. Before you give up and toss date night to the side, consider these fun ideas for a free/cheap date night in Kansas City:
- Take a Class together. Community Centers, Parks & Rec Depts., Area Colleges, Cooking Stores, and Libraries all offer classes that are free and/or cheap. Read our feature, Community Education in Kansas City to find a class. Some of our favorites have included: Hot Air Balloon Flying Lessons, Oil Painting, Cooking classes, Dance lessons, and Silversmithing. Prices for classes range from FREE (i.e. Library) to cheap (i.e. Community Education at the local colleges) to splurge (i.e. KC Culinary Center).
- FREE Art Galleries. Spend an evening visiting a local art gallery. The Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art is open till 9pm on Thursday and Friday. The Kemper Museum of Modern Art is open till 9pm on Friday and Saturday. Or, plan a date on the First Friday of the month when you can tour galleries in the Crossroads.
- Wine Tasting. Kansas City boasts several local wineries, including Holyfield Winery in Bonner Spring, KS (913.724.9463), Pirtle Winery in Weston, MO (816.640.5728) and Stonehaus Farms Winery in Lee’s Summit, MO (816.554.8800). All offer tastings (contact them for details). You can also enjoy tastings at Off the Vine (913.681.7960) and Trezo Vino Wine Bistro (913.327.8466).
- Dessert or Appetizers Only. Eat dinner at home, then go out for appetizers or dessert only. Some of our favorites include the Chocolate Bag at McCormick & Schmick on the Plaza, Amore Chocolate Pizza’s Fondue Bar, Sushi Gin in Overland Park or frozen yogurt.
- Movies. The Noland Fashion Square Cinema shows movies for $2/ticket (816.478.2223), the Screenland Crown Center runs deals regularly, and the Cinemark on the Plaza offers one of the best affordable seats in town. For a treat, splurge on ticket at Olathe AMC Forks and Screens or the Plaza VIP Room where you enjoy a movie, leather recliners and food delivered to your seat.
- Laugh Out Loud. If you’re in need of a laugh, take in a show at Comedy City (816.842.2744) where you’ll enjoy live Improv.
- Go for a Long Walk / Bike Ride / Roller Blade. You’ll find a complete list of local gardens and nature centers at www.KCGoingPlaces.com but some of our free favorites include the Overland Park Arboretum, Ironwoods Park, Burr Oak Woods Nature Center, Leawood City Park, Waterfall Park in Independence, Antioch Park, Loose Park, Longview Lake and Kauffman Gardens. The book, Hiking Kansas City, is an excellent resource for inspiration with maps and details for every location.
- More Ideas in our feature "Free & Cheap Date Night Ideas in KC."
Many of Kristina Light’s favorite date nights are on the free list… the Nelson-Atkins Museum of Art, First Fridays in the Crossroads and Shakespeare in the Park.