All my life I can remember having a consistent dream: to one day be a Mom. Sometimes I have to do a double-take when I look in the back seat and see two faces looking at me - two children God has entrusted to me and given me the joy and privilege to be their Mom. For all the dirty, messy moments of motherhood filled with diapers, spills, stains, late-nights, and early mornings, recognizing just how special it is that a precious miracle has been entrusted to you for a period time is mind-blowing!
For all the billions of people in the world, I have two children who get all of my love and attention. I get to tuck them in bed at night, be the first face they see when they wake up, and comfort them when they scrape their knee, are afraid of the dark, or have loved and lost. When my child is uncomfortable around strangers or new situations, they find solace in ME. I think of the times that I have felt impatient with my daughter's shyness, being the extroverted Italian that I am, not exactly understanding shyness or being "slow to warm up" to people. And yet, when I think of how special it is that she clings to my leg and hides behind me when the shyness overtakes her, I'm moved by love that captures my heart. She feels safe with me. She knows I'll protect her. When she bravely goes to a door on Halloween night and is overcome with feelings of fear or inhibitions and turns around with an outreached hand and asks me to ring the door with her, that makes my heart soar!
Too often we can be inconvenienced or misunderstand our children resulting in impatience and general herding. "You're fine, just go up there and ring the bell!" But when I stop and see the bigger picture here, I'm moved with compassion and overwhelmed with love.
I have the privilege of being the one person you connect with the most (and the earliest) in life. I get to watch you take your first steps, say your first words, wear your first Homecoming dress, hold you in your heartache of your first loss, and so many other moments that are reserved in an unspoken sort of way for Moms and Dads. I know you better than anyone - your preschool teacher, your grandparents, your friends in the neighborhood. I've been a part of every day of your life, and since I think you're pretty amazing, that makes me feel like the most blessed person around.
Next time you find yourself knee-deep in kid activities, tripping over toys in the house, or working on homework and helping one study for a test, remember the privilege you have. It is just that.