When I was in high school, my best friend had a yearly clothing allowance, and I thought it was the coolest thing ever! Probably (as she wasn't allowed to discuss it) it wasn't any more money than my parents spent on my clothes during the year, but what made it seem so neat to me was that it was something she could control herself. It seemed very empowering.
Many kids don't understand the concept of money. Ever watch "King of the Hill?" In one episode Hank asks his twelve-year-old son Bobby how much he thinks his cotton shorts cost, the kind Target sells for about eight bucks. Bobby answers, "These are nice shorts, I'd say probably $100." Hopefully, most kids have a better concept of money than Bobby, but chances are they have plenty of room for learning more.
One way parents can help their kids understand the concept of money is to allow them a back to school clothing allowance, instead of the parents spending indiscriminately or working within a budget in their own minds. Giving your kids a figure to work off of and bounce around in their minds will help them understand what it means to work within a budget, a good lesson to start learning at any age.
They will be forced to make judgments - Do I buy all these cool t-shirts with slogans, or do I buy pants, which I really need? They will be forced to be practical - Do I want these $70 designer jeans, or do I want the $35 jeans, a $20 dress shirt, and a $15 t-shirt? They will have to think about the future - Do I buy all short sleeve shirts, or should I buy something that's long sleeved for the winter?
Some kids can be dropped off at the mall with a few guidelines as to what must be purchased. Most cannot. But so much more than budgeting is learned from shopping. It's a good chance for parents to get to know what kind of culture their kids are being exposed to and a good time for the kids to learn from you about proper fit and fabrics and coordination. Consider it some quality time with your kids as well. As kids get older, sometimes the only time they'll be seen with their parents is when they have the money!
Be realistic. You know what your child needs, and you know what you have available to spend. Allowing a child less money than is practical will automatically make your child fail. This of course, could make your child give up on the idea of ever making a budget work. Set it up so that your expectations are reasonable and can be achieved.
Be firm. If they grow up thinking they can always squeeze a little bit more out of you, they will learn to squeeze more out of their own budgets, and most of us in the credit card generation understand the problems that can bring.
Do your best to allow your child to show her or his personality while staying within the guidelines of what your family considers appropriate attire. This is about asserting their independence and critical thinking skills, but that doesn't mean you can't influence their decisions or even disallow a purchase if necessary.
Kids need clear choices; they will not automatically "get" it. You can help them learn by reminding them of the overall "project" status. For example, "Okay, you have this much money left, you've bought this and this, and you still need this and this. How should we handle it?"
Is this the easy way to do it? Of course not. It's much easier to hand over the credit card and say, "Try not to spend too much." But parenting is about sharing knowledge and allowing kids to grow their own. As much as they may complain that you're out of touch or so un-cool, remain patient and supportive - they are absorbing way more than you think. Happy shopping!
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