Dreaming is a perfectly normal and healthy part of a child’s daily life. It’s those big dreams and aspirations that push kids to learn in school, play hard at recess and create pillow forts and magical fantasylands on the weekends. Unfortunately, there’s a time and a place for dreaming—and during the workday isn’t necessarily one of them.
Oftentimes, children haven’t yet developed a way to focus their time and thoughts. If the urge to dream about being the next Olympic swimmer comes to them during math class, they’re going to follow the dream and see where it leads. While day dreaming can be a wonderful experience for the dreamer, it is wildly frustrating for those on the other side who are trying to engage them. What’s to be done? Here are some tips.
Identify and address
Children may not even be aware that they’re daydreaming. From their perspective, they simply followed a thought. At home, when you see kids’ minds wandering, identify what is happening right then. Explain that taking their minds off the task at hand can be frustrating or even dangerous. For example, if you’re making cookies and start to daydream, you might not remember to set a timer and the cookies will burn. This is not to instill fear, but rather to show them that daydreaming can have real consequences. Some kids find it helpful to have a notebook nearby at all times. When a thought comes up, they can jot it down quickly to circle back to at a more appropriate time.
Establish distraction-free zones
Kids who daydream are sidetracked easily. Remove distractions like a radio or television on in the background when you are asking for their complete attention. Additionally, consider limiting screen time on iPads or game consoles. Games and shows are intentionally fast-paced, bright and loud. This will do nothing to help calm your child’s brain down. Try going unplugged before and after school by having free play for at least 30 minutes. In our household, we call this “getting out our wiggles” so we can focus harder later.
Take walking breaks
For kids with trouble focusing, movement is absolutely paramount to letting their minds move. Work in a few walks throughout the day or trips to the local park to play—and daydream! These activities require very little mental focus, so your children can feel free to let their brains run wild. You might find that afterward they are calmer and more engaged because they’ve let those rogue thoughts out to breathe.
Try meditation
Clearly, children can’t be expected to sit still for 60 minutes and “ohm” their way to a higher being. But a quick search for Mindful Meditations for Kids on YouTube can be a good start. You’ll find hundreds of 5- to 10-minute meditations geared toward kids, encouraging thoughtful reflections and intentional breathing to help re-center their very active minds. At first, children might resist this, but keep at it. After a few times, you might be surprised at how responsive they become.
Lift your child up
Never shame a child for daydreaming. Dreams are what keep this world creative and fun and the future bright! Build in time throughout the day to foster turning those dreams into realities while maintaining an expectation for focused work too.
Most importantly, praise your children when you see them working hard to stay focused on their tasks. They need your approval and want to do well, so let them know when they’re doing great! Dreaming is for everyone—it just needs to be done at the right time and place.
Kim Antisdel is a freelance writer and interior design sales rep for KC. She lives in Liberty with her husband, stepdaughters and son.