We parents strive to give our children the absolute best. When it comes down to how we give and receive information, why should that be any different? As much as I don’t want to admit or believe it, I can’t be in 10 different places at one time. I don’t always make gourmet meals. I forget my kids’ names sometimes and I’ve never used the Pythagorean Theorem in my adult life ever. So how on God’s green earth can I be trusted to tutor or know when my future shining star is in need of a tutor? If you struggle like I do, keep reading. You’re not alone.
Who knows first? What are our resources?
If you’re not sure whether your kid is struggling, test the theory with a few of these techniques:
- Make an appointment with the guidance counselor and talk to the teachers.
You’d be surprised at how many parents avoid this step and how many teachers are ready and available to talk through your children’s strengths and weaknesses. When I was young girl, parent teacher conferences took place every quarter, and the school’s faculty made an event of it. In this new age, things are a bit different, so talk to your child, reach out to the school’s administration and see what’s going on.
- Reach out to the instructors via email.
In this new age of COVID-19 and technology, communication is changing. You don’t have to send a note attached to your kid’s collar these days. Because schools are going more digital, it’s much easier to gain an email address of your child’s teacher or someone else fluent in a subject your student struggles in. Use it! Hybrid learning and tutoring in this new age works for everyone. Embrace it with open arms.
- Talk to your children and ask them what they love or hate.
Talking about school doesn’t have to be a hard conversation—talk about it during dinner. You can even open the floor by going first. I used to love when my mom told us about her childhood and classes. She killed it! Or use story time as a way to get your children to reveal their least and favorite subjects in a safe environment. From there, you can give suggestions and hone in on how you can help.
It’s not always easy to see trouble, but if you do that initial digging, you’ll find a flag or two. The very first red flag for me and my kiddo was his taking a little more time. Before the kids in my house can go play or hang with their friends and have fun, we get “the business” taken care of. “The business” in our house consists of homework, chores and dinner prep (simple things like table setup or bringing in the groceries). When my youngest child started coming to the table 20 minutes after everyone else did, or when he started missing fun events and took a little longer to finish his chores, I did a little investigating.
I remember my first ah-ha moment with tutoring like it was yesterday. I peeked into his room to find him stretched across the bed with wads of balled-up paper circling him. When I asked him whether everything was okay, his initial response was, “I can’t do this fast.” When he looked up, and I saw those big brown eyes filled with despair, mommy mode kicked right in. Before I knew it, we both were stretched across that same bed with a book, wads of paper and division on the menu. By the end of the night, we got it together, but the key was noticing the red flags and acting on them early. Now, he’s a pro with division and is even teaching me the new waves in math.
When do I know outside tutoring is necessary? Knowing when you are out of your league.
Now, it’s great to jump in and take care of business when you have to, but knowing when you’re out of your league and need to solicit help is crucial. Although counting and equations come easy to me, science and all the elements of the periodic table simply do not. So if my child ever struggles with molecules or atoms, I’m calling in the cavalry and every science wizard I know.
Keep a sharp eye out for red flags your child might be waving. When you see them, remember to get right to work, stay engaged, be patient and always encourage your child to keep learning.
T Is for Tutor
Ask questions.
Be confident.
Be flexible.
Be honest.
Be patient.
Collaborate.
Do the work.
Lead the way.
Listen.
Share experiences.
Stay engaged.
Teach.
Jessica Samuel lives in Kansas City and is a freelance writer and photographer.