“I love doing chores!” said no one ever.
Okay. Maybe someone out there has said this, but most of us probably would rather be doing other things. Chores, however, are a part of life, and they are a big part of what helps teach children a good work ethic, one that will help them succeed not only in their future careers, but in their daily lives as well.
Thinking children just naturally grow up demonstrating perseverance, self-discipline or good frustration tolerance is unrealistic. These character traits are learned, and they’re learned from parents. Want to be sure your child will develop a good work ethic and the ability to tough it out when things get difficult? Here are some great tips on how to lead her into becoming a responsible, self-sufficient adult.
- Start chores at a young age. It’s so much easier to introduce a good habit with a preschooler than to break a bad habit with a tween. When teaching young children to work, you’ll find they typically need a lot of practice before they get it. Show them how to do a chore a few times and then work alongside them and help them do the chore. When you know they’ve gotten it, allow them to do it on their own—and be sure to inspect their work.
- Model hard work in front of them. Remember: “More is caught than taught.” You can’t expect your child to work hard if he doesn’t see you working hard. So, be a good role model. Show pride in your accomplishments. Children are always watching and listening.
- Make work fun and routine. Kids love to work when you make it fun! Play upbeat music that motivates everyone and make work part of your regular routine. For example, if your child knows she must make her bed before breakfast every morning, it becomes much less of a fight to get her to do it. So instead of being a casual happening, work becomes an expectation rather than a chore.
- Give them praise. Don’t focus on pointing out the things your child does wrong or needs to improve on. Instead, focus on praising what she did well. Encouragement goes a long way. Your words of praise will build your child up. She’ll be motivated and inspired to work hard and diligently.
- Treat school like a job. That’s right. Schoolwork and homework are a big part of the foundation for a good work ethic. The teacher is the boss, and your child’s “job” is to keep up with schoolwork and do his best. School offers a huge opportunity to developing a work ethic. Maybe your son doesn’t enjoy his math homework, but he should do it without a fight, in a timely manner and with good effort. When you create clear rules and consequences around schoolwork completion and effort, you help start your child on the right path to understanding the value and reward of hard work.
- Don’t use bribes. When your child is lazing around rather than getting his chore done, hold back on your frustration and desire to bribe him. Telling him, “If you finish within 30 minutes, we’ll go to the park,” will only make him work for the end result, not learn the value of hard work. Instead of bribing with food or other rewards, talk to him about why he’s doing the work. “We need to pick up the toys so no one trips over them and gets hurt.” Helping your child understand the real-life reasons for work will inspire him to get it done.
- Encourage volunteering. Get your child(ren) out there to help in the community–reading to or playing games with the elderly in a nursing home, serving food at a local soup kitchen or spending time with the cats and dogs in an animal shelter. Studies confirm this not only benefits others but develops a sense of pride in the volunteer.
Research shows that children who persist and excel recognize that success comes from hard work and practice. While some kids are naturally more hardworking than others, that doesn’t mean a strong work ethic can’t be taught. When you put value in teamwork, cooperation and finishing tasks at home, your kids eventually will grow to be hardworking teens and adults.
Kansas City mom and author Gina Klein always has made chores a daily routine for her two homeschooled daughters, and she’s happy to report that the initial whining quickly turned into a sense of responsibility and accomplishment.