Fear can be thrilling in this season of Halloween tricks and haunts, but this common “negative emotion” can also catch us and our kids in its grip and become hard to shake. Fear serves an important evolutionary function, activating our body’s alert-and-response system to keep us safe from perceived threats. It narrows our thoughts and focuses our actions, pumping extra adrenaline-enriched blood to our extremities for a fight or flight response. However, fear and all its cousins—anxiety, panic, worry, dread—create problems when we overreact to false dangers. They take a toll on our bodies through sustained levels of stress, which are linked to high rates of disease and illness. And for some of us, these emotions can linger and ratchet up to generalized anxiety, keeping us on high alert and making it hard for our bodies to return to equilibrium.
As a person who’s struggled with an anxiety disorder, I have great compassion for others struggling with this dis-ease. Beyond seeking professional help and its powerful, research-backed strategies for dealing with anxiety, what can we do when we’re caught in a sudden spiral of fear and panic? What coping skills can we teach to our children when they, too, struggle with anxiety? The three following exercises are easy-to-remember tools to tuck into your anxiety toolbelt and put to use when fear overwhelms you.
5-4-3-2-1 Sensory Mindfulness
Anxiety can make us feel dizzy and untethered from our bodies. A quick solution is to become instantly mindful of our surroundings, tapping into our five senses with this exercise. Name five things you see, four sounds you hear, three sensations you feel, two scents you smell and one flavor you taste (pop a mint into your mouth if you have one and focus your attention on its sharp taste). This exercise will instantly ground you, increasing your sense of calm and rootedness.
S-T-O-P
A common acronym for dealing with stress, S-T-O-P stands for:
Stop what you’re doing. Take a deep breath. Observe your thoughts and emotions (sensations in your body). Proceed with a healthy response. The third step, observing your emotions—describing where you feel fear inside your body, and allowing this sensation without resistance—is an especially potent antidote to the alert-and-response flare-up. Why? Because emotions we resist persist. And emotions that we simply allow and feel begin to heal.
Move Fast or Slow
The previous exercises are effective ways of slowing our bodies and calming down through mindfulness. The opposite of slowing down—moving fast—is another way of dealing with in-the-moment anxiety. We move fast by exercising our bodies and increasing our heartrate, which counteracts the effects of stress. Our bloodstream—once flooded with stress hormones like norepinephrine, adrenaline and cortisol—begins to exchange this noxious chemical cocktail for a feel-better blast of endorphins, relieving stress and fear and boosting inner peace.
Wendy Connelly, M.Div., is a podcaster (MoJo For Moms podcast), life coach and mother of two from Overland Park. You can find Wendy’s latest podcasts, speaking events, media appearances and more at MoJoForMoms.com.