Is there a Goldilocks age to pregnancy—you know, not too old, not too young but “just right”? Many a mama asks the question, and as it turns out, there are pros and cons to pregnancy in every decade. What we do know is that for all the concerns of potential risks that come with advanced maternal age, more women than ever are confidently and healthfully having babies later in life. In fact, the number of pregnant women between the ages of 35 and 49 has tripled since the 1970s! So, what’s the verdict? It’s really up to you! But by adopting healthy lifestyle habits and seeking early prenatal care, mamas of any age can have a wonderful pregnancy that results in a healthy baby. Here’s what you can expect when you are expecting in your 20s, 30s and 40s.
In Your 20s
The Highlights: A mama in her 20s will find that she’s typically in peak physical health. Long gone are the irregular cycles that come and go in teenage years, meaning it’s not only easiest to get pregnant, but easiest on your body to be pregnant. Aches and pains will be minimal since your joints have had less wear and tear, and you’re not as likely to deal with complications that arise with age, such as gestational diabetes, preeclampsia or chronic hypertension. Your baby is also at lower risk of medical conditions such as spina bifida or Downs Syndrome (at 25, your baby’s risk of Down Syndrome is 1 in 1,250, whereas it’s one in 378 when you are 35). And let’s not forget this other perk: having a baby in your 20s means you will boast the most amount of energy to keep up with your rough and tumble little one. Playing hard and handling those tough seasons of sleepless nights will be far less taxing on you in this season of life than later. On the flip side, being a young mom also means you may enjoy being a young empty nester. And then lastly, being a young mom means you may more than likely have young parents. And there’s nothing better than Grandma’s and Grandpa’s being able to play an active and vibrant part in your child’s life!
The Challenges: As people elect to have children later in life, you may find yourself lacking support within your own social network. Look to build relationships with other mom friends that can relate to the highs and lows of parenthood through programs like MOPS International. Likewise, young couples have equally young marriages, careers and financial situations. Make sure to invest in time with your spouse to build secure bonds that will temper the challenges of navigating this new and uncharted territory.
In Your 30s
The Highlights: Your body may be primed and ready physically for pregnancy in its 20s, but many women feel they are far more capable emotionally to tackle motherhood head on in their 30’s. With an extra decade under her belt, a woman has had time to establish herself personally and professionally along with developing a solid and secure relationship with her spouse. This extra time can provide a financial buffer for the extra expenses that come with a little blessing. Most women have a gaggle of friends that are already in the throes of motherhood, meaning a mom can enjoy shared experiences with her longtime besties. By the time you hit your mid-30s you get a name upgrade: advanced maternal age. You may feel too young to be labeled so old, but rest assured, most healthy women still have very uneventful pregnancies during their 30s.
The Challenges: There’s much to be said for gaining life experience and maturity, but all those perks come with a catch—mainly, your eggs are maturing, too, and they’re also slowing down. Getting pregnant in your 20s might have been a cinch, but expect the process to take a little longer now that your fastest moving eggs have bid you adieu. Even without fertility issues and with good health, a mom in her 30s can expect to spend three to six months trying to conceive. Age might be just a number, but by the time you hit 35, expect to be tested for high risk complications, such as placenta previa or gestational diabetes. Pesky pounds that pack their way on may be to blame, as obesity can be a contributing factor to complications, so how you take care of yourself may be more important than how old you actually are.
In Your 40s
The Highlights: You are older, wiser and far more established. While young moms have the prize of free time looming on the horizon, your “me time” came right out of the gate in your 20s and 30s. Your life experience can reap huge dividends in your pregnancy, giving you the confidence to more assertively advocate for yourself in the hospital, workplace and beyond. Mature moms typically are the most active in their health care plans and are experts in negotiating ideal terms of family-friendly employment like flex time or telecommuting. Of course, if they wish to stay at home, they can do so guilt-free as well. They also come better equipped with coping strategies for high-stress situations, meaning they can take the challenges of parenting better in stride.
The Challenges: Make no bones about it … pregnancy in your 40s, although growing in popularity, is not without its challenges. Simply trying to get pregnant can be one of the biggest obstacles. More than 50 percent struggle to conceive at this age, and time is of essence as your rate of fertility declines 5 percent each month from age 40 on. Risks are much the same as a woman in her 30s with two marked distinctions: chromosomal abnormalities and miscarriage. You’re also three times more likely to develop gestational diabetes. Women in this age bracket may find themselves in the precarious position of caretaking both a newborn and aging parents. It’s also likely you won’t have as many friends with young children in this stage of life. Take heart, though: Motherhood can be the ultimate unifier, bringing women of every age together.
Freelance writer Lauren Greenlee has had the spectrum of pregnancy experiences: three while she was in her 20s and her last as a more “mature” mom. She writes from her Olathe home.
As always, please consult your health care provider with questions or concerns.