It might seem hard to believe for some parents, but the kids know it’s true: It’s summertime and the living is ... well it’s different.
Summer for school-age children means lots of extra time on their hands for fun and games. For parents it can bring considerable apprehension: After all, wasn’t last summer a nightmare with children misbehaving, getting into all sorts of trouble? Aren’t idle hands . . . well trouble?
Parents should understand that it’s only natural for the transition from school time to summertime to affect children’s behavior, according to Rochelle Harris, PhD, child psychologist at Children’s Mercy Hospitals and Clinics. Even positive change can create both turmoil and stress.
Dr. Harris says it’s important for parents to take the time to plan and organize the child’s summer.
"Summer is too long to just hang out and do nothing," Dr. Harris says. "The children should have some sort of responsibility. You can take this as an opportunity to teach them a wide variety of things."
Dr. Harris says it’s important for parents to plan ahead of time to help make the transition to summer a smooth one. She also says it’s important to provide some form of structure for kids.
"By planning your child’s summer, you can provide structure that gives them a predictable sense of security," she says.
Harris says parents — especially non-working parents — often feel a sense of guilt over registering their kids for structured activities like summer day camps. But, she says some kids simply need the structure and can learn a lot. Also, it’s healthier for everyone involved to have some time away from each other.
Dr. Harris suggests the following to provide the proper structure for your child’s summer:
- Make a giant calendar of summer activities. Include all events, big and little, that your family has planned. Let the kids help decide which events to include, and alternate plans in case of rain. The calendar gives them a better understanding of time, and teaches them planning skills.
- Plan daily detailed activities for younger kids or kids who need more structure. For example, put on the weekly calendar that Tuesday afternoons a babysitter comes over while mom goes to the store; Thursday mornings are family time at the pool.
- Set some goals for summer activities: They will read “x” number of books; the family will visit the zoo or a museum. These activities are an opportunity to teach your children and have fun. Also, if you don’t schedule them, you might never get around to doing them.
- Plan to spend one-on-one time with your children. Put it on the calendar. Ideally, parents should spend 15 to 20 minutes daily with each child individually.
- Decide on some meaningful projects, such as going through old toys and donating them to charity. Mixing responsibility and fun is important. Also, set daily goals for the children, like making their beds or feeding the pets.
- Make sure the level of activity during any out-of-town vacation is not frantic. It’s stressful enough to be in an unfamiliar environment.
- Plan some downtime for the kids. Too many activities can lead to cranky kids and tired parents.
- By following these tips, your children will get the structure they need, and learn some important lessons. Best of all, it will help ensure that summer will be filled with anticipation, and looked back upon fondly.