Living Large: Big Family Perspectives That Can Benefit You

Raising six children has taught me many valuable lessons that have changed for the better my perspective on parenting, housework, finances and relationships. You do not need to have a big family to live like a big family and use the principles most larger families are forced to apply. Here are some large family perspectives that all families should consider, no matter what their size.

On Time

            Time is something we all want more of. The change in perspective here is that large families must use their time more wisely. If there is an hour for cleaning, get up and clean. If there is an hour for playing, make the most of it and enjoy your children. If you have two hours to spend with your spouse, turn off the TV and talk. Put down your cell phone and ask the kids how school went. Rise early in the morning to spend some quiet time alone so you feel refreshed for a busy and full day.

Benefits for all families: When you use time wisely, you’ll discover more time for the things you enjoy.

On Disagreements

            Large families have to learn to let go of what they cannot control. Moms of many learn that fighting about whether the 4- and 2-year-old wear coordinating t-shirts or matching socks is not a battle that is worth ruining a day, or even an hour, over. If the child is dressed appropriately for the weather, then the child is ready to go. By choosing to let the small things go and work through the important things as a team, fewer disagreements mushroom.

Benefits for all families: Learn not to sweat the small stuff, which helps create healthy relationships and more peace for everyone.

On Differences

            We all realize that each person is different and has his own unique gifts, talents, opinions, quirks and habits. Larger families learn to embrace differences because their own house is a diverse place. Growing up in this environment creates an appreciation for our differences and teaches kids to be accepting. You don’t have to have a lot of kids to know that life is precious and children are a gift.

 Benefits for all families: Celebrate and accept people for what makes them unique.

On Budgeting

Large families must work with a tight budget and learn to cut costs in creative ways. Families can find many ways to trim the budget, and all families have to choose what works for them. Some ideas may include cooking from scratch, buying used instead of new, cutting out cable or taking on household repair projects yourself.

Benefits for all families: Learn to spend wisely and save money.

On Chores

            Working as a team and sharing chores is a necessity for large families to maintain the house. Teamwork is a skill valued in school and in the workplace. Kids in large families learn to use teamwork to accomplish tasks and work with others in all situations. Kids also learn how to effectively do chores they will be expected to take on in adulthood.

Benefits for all families: When everyone pitches in, the work goes faster, and children learn responsibility and skills they will use as adults.

            Large families may stumble upon these perspectives out of necessity, but families of any size can benefit from them.

Sarah Lyons found herself with a large family overnight after the birth of their triplets in 2014, when they went from a family of five to a family of eight. She has since found that this shift has changed her family’s perspectives for the better.