There comes a time when children will encounter a new activity. Maybe you sign them up for piano lessons. Or a tumbling class. Maybe you want them to join a soccer or baseball team to help with their social skills.
These experiences and new activities are pivotal moments in a child’s life. Never mind that they’re pretty sweet memories for parents, too. Watching your child try, practice and excel at a new activity is heartwarming. It lights up that special level of parenting pleasure you might not have experienced before. And the overall learning experiences that come with those new activities go far beyond the actual skills it takes to do the activity. Those lessons stay with kids for life.
How to present a new activity
Presentation is important. Some children can’t emotionally handle a new activity presented to them on the fly. Many children may need time to prepare. How you share a new activity with your child could make all the difference in how comfortable they are going into it.
Stay positive. Make it exciting. You might even consider doing the new activity with a friend they already know. Or at least one they’re familiar with. This makes new things feel safer for children.
Reassure them
Children look to their parents for reassurance. If you’re calm and collected, there’s a higher chance your kids will be, too! Try to be aware of their nervousness. Although you can’t predict everything, you do know your child best. Reassure them from the time you tell them about the new venture to when they step out to the field, on the court or into the building. Kids will go off of how you’re acting and feeling.
Preparation is key
Though reassurance is important through the entire process, preparing your child before a new activity is key. Remember to prepare children mentally, physically and emotionally. Use things like new supplies or equipment to build excitement for a new activity. Bring kids with you to purchase things they’ll need. Let them make choices about which color new socks or bat they want.
If your child is especially nervous, see whether you can meet the coach or teacher ahead of time. Keep the first interaction brief and light. Make sure your child sees you interacting positively with this new adult.
How to prepare a child for a new activity mentally:
- Make a countdown chain or mark days off a calendar. Most children like to know exactly when their new activity starts. Because time is an abstract concept for most young children, this is a great visual.
- Discuss things you’ll need to do before the activity starts. Maybe you need to buy equipment or materials. Feeling like they’re part of the preparation beforehand can help children better prepare for their new activity.
How to prepare a child for a new activity physically:
- A new activity is something physically new for your child, too. Even if they aren’t playing a sport, you can discuss things they’ll need to work on physically. For example, if they’re tumbling, talk about stretching and taking care of the body to make it strong and healthy. Talk about the new things—though unable to do now—they will be able to do with practice.
- Work to prepare your child in concrete ways. This might be purchasing new equipment. Tell them that before they can start their new activity, they need to have the right equipment, protection or supplies. Talk through how these things help them to be safe, effective and prepared.
How to prepare a child for a new activity emotionally:
- Young children often process new experiences in different and unseen ways. It’s important to take time to prepare your child for the activity. Check in with how they’re feeling. Are they scared? Excited? Unsure?
- This is a great opportunity to talk about how we all process feelings. Talk to your child about how it’s normal to feel two different things at once! Relate a time that you were nervous—or make one up! Kids can feel both excited and nervous. Or happy and shy.
Make small goals
The easiest way to prepare for something new is to start small. Start with smaller goals, conversation and preparation. You don’t want to go in with tremendous enthusiasm or a bundle of new equipment, which can feel overwhelming for a small child. Actually, this feels overwhelming to most people! New experiences are unknown, and the unknown can be scary for anyone.
Make small goals with your child each time. Maybe for the first class, the goal is that your child walks into the building! Then in the next class, it’s that they talk to someone else. Or even try the activity.
Celebrate the wins
Celebrate the wins when a child is doing something unfamiliar, especially small wins. After the first game (despite winning or losing), go out for ice cream. Or after the first lesson, call and virtually celebrate with a loved one who lives far away.
New things can be scary for children and difficult to navigate for parents. We want to prepare our children the best way we can and provide them with all the right tools and emotions for doing a new activity. We know they will eventually experience new challenges with any activity, but we hope to prepare them the best way we know how in the meantime.
Kailyn Rhinehart writes from Warrensburg, Missouri. She lives with her husband and two small children, and even she gets nervous about new activities as an adult.