The perfect playdate—or close to it

The perfect playdate doesn’t exist … or does it? Well, we’re here to help you set yourself up for success. Kids are wild and unpredictable (and so much fun), so it’s important to prepare.

First, you know your child best. Consider their limits. If they are ultra-introverted, a one-on-one setting may be ideal. If you’ve got a more extroverted child, they may thrive in a group setting. It could take some trial and error to figure out what works for your family, but that’s OK, too.

Next, choose the setting. A neutral or familiar environment will work best for both parties for your first meet-up. The park is a perfect spot to prevent having to share toys and to reduce that stressor. The library is a nice, calm setting, but for vocal kids with extra wiggles, it could feel a bit restricting. Again, it just depends on the kiddo and the time of day. Both options are free and enriching.

Choose a window of time. Do mornings work best before nap time? Or is your child happiest and most ready to socialize after nap time and lunch? Recognizing and accommodating this small detail will help set you and your child up for success. Hungry, sleepy kids don’t typically feel like socializing. If you can choose a window of time that best suits your kiddo’s needs, it will make this activity more fun for both of you. Chances are, your friend is in the same boat and will share your feelings.

Try to remain present. This is a tough one, but once you have all details ironed out and possible scenarios planned for, try to just sit back and let your children engage with each other. Provide guidance or redirection when needed, but they’ll most likely have fun all on their own. Parents, try to relax and enjoy chatting with another adult. Cheers!

Keep the playdate short. This leaves less time for major meltdowns, which are totally acceptable by the way, burnout or overexertion for both parents and kids. Shorter, more frequent playdates are the key, sometimes. Your kids will thrive with that routine, too.

• Pro tip: Keep snacks on hand. Be sure to check on everyone’s allergy list because most kids like to share food.
• Pro tip: If you meet at either of your houses, keep treasured toys out of reach to reduce the risk of something happening to a comfort item. There’s no need to stress either kiddo out—let them know “Teddy” or “Bunny” is in a safe space where no one will take it.
• Keep rules simple: “Be kind. Be courteous,” for example. Even if the kids have trouble grasping that concept, as kids sometimes do, parents may guide them in the right direction.

If you’re feeling extra organized, you might even set up a Facebook group for coordination with your gathering of mom friends. The visual reminders and help with planning are great tools. Keep the meet-ups flexible and low-key. With everyone’s ever-changing schedules and unpredictability (for example, sick kiddos and stomach bugs), it’s nice to have back-up plans and rain checks.

Emily Morrison is a freelance writer, former copy editor, full-time mommy and Disney fanatic who lives in Independence with her husband, son, daughter and dog.