Tame the Butterflies
These days, kids are taking more tests—and earlier—than ever before. Anxiety over a pressure to perform academically or athletically is an increasing problem that affects a wide age range of children. Some stress is to be expected and is normal, but keep an eye out for severe anxiety symptoms.
Here are some tips to help tame the butterflies.
Before the Big Day
- Be Positive. If your child gets stuck in a negativity loop, to neutralize negative thoughts have them think of anything that makes them feel good, and stay calm and positive yourself. Run through practice tests with your child to build confidence. The real test should feel like nothing new. Kick a soccer ball around. Even if you’re terrible at it, you’ll boost your child’s confidence in his abilities and have some fun.
- Get Organized. Clutter is a distraction. Have your child organize a workspace or any needed equipment in advance so when the time comes, she is prepared. Create worksheets to help your child identify how much training or studying time she needs and when. Also, set minor pre-goals to work toward, which will make the big one seems less daunting. Factor in your child’s attention span. If you push beyond it—without breaks—that time will prove fruitless.
- Talk It Through. What are your child’s fears? Is she afraid of failing a big test and not getting into medical school? Is he worried he’ll trip on the field and look like a doofus in front of his friends? What are the what if’s? Check out www.PBSKids.org printable resources online.
The Night Before
- Avoid Cramming. Dr. Michelle Borba, award-winning author of 22 parenting and educational books, knows cramming is counterproductive. “Test-anxious kids figure they will worry less by putting their studying off and then cramming at the last minute. But it backfires and instead increases anxiety,” she says. If your child has developed good study habits, she shouldn’t need to cram. Try doing something fun or relaxing with her the night before. Have family game night.
- Sleep. The recommended minimum is 8 to 10 hours. A Twitter poll shows that most parents believe that a good breakfast and a good night’s sleep are the keys to squashing jitters.
On the Day:
- Eat a Good Breakfast. An empty belly will leave your child distracted and unable to focus or perform. Stuff them full of protein and complex carbohydrates that provide sustaining energy and nutrition. Try eggs, cereal or oatmeal for example.
- Relax. A teen I know practices yoga breathing and stretching techniques before exams. If your loved one isn’t keen on swinging into a few sun salutations in front of his friends, closing his eyes, deep breathing and consciously relaxing will help.
Victoria Pressley lives in Leavenworth with her family.