This weekend, a friend of mine posted something on Facebook that stirred my thoughts and emotions. She recently adopted a little girl with disabilities. On Saturday, they went to the local parade and she observed that the fact that her daughter was in a wheelchair made a clear difference in how they were treated. She wrote, "Can I please remind people in public that my child uses a wheelchair - she isn't an alien and you can't "catch" anything from her. I would rather people make stupid comments in an attempt to be polite rather than pretend like we don't exist."
Over the years, I've had many dear friends who happen to use wheelchairs instead of tennis shoes to get around. One of my closest friends, now a family friend, is a former co-worker who uses a wheelchair or scooter to get around. He's been asked more than once why we became friends because, on face value, we're an "odd match" in the friendship department. His answer, "When we worked together, she treated me exactly the same way she treated everyone else in our office. I appreciated that and we've been friends ever since."
I have observed many times when we eat out with friends or family who are in wheelchairs that servers will often speak loudly to them, as if they may have a hearing loss. Others will explain things slowly as if they were speaking to a young child. Still others will try to look away and play a game of avoidance for fear that they may appear to be staring, so instead they ignore completely.
If there's one thing I've learned from my "wheeled" friends (a term borrowed from a friend) over the years, it's that they are JUST wheels. And, the person in the driver's seat has opinions and thoughts and feelings of their very own... the main one, "Please treat me as you would if I were standing next to you in running shoes. That's all I want... to be treated just like everyone else."
Written by Kristina Light