Foster Care in Kansas City
Even before Jonathan and Rachel Boese tied the knot, they knew their future included being foster parents. The Olathe couple met working in a foster care agency, and conversations centered on building a home on love and commitment to one another and their own future children, as well as children within the foster care system that needed a safe and stable place to land. Realizing the “perfect time” was an illusion, they dove head first into the training and certification process a few years into their marriage.
The young family, which then had grown to include a 3-year-old and a 1-year-old, received big news the day their first placement arrived: Rachel was pregnant with their third child. The Boese family continued to grow in more ways than one in the years to come. Within their foster care career, they have welcomed sibling sets and a teenager aging out of the foster care system. The Boese family currently has four young biological children of their own. Many may wonder how a family in the midst of so much life change themselves could take on the challenge of caring for additional children. Rachel’s response is simple.
“Honestly, if I had a dollar for every time someone told me they thought about doing it when ‘life settled down,’ I'd be rich,” she says. Acknowledging that life never lends a dull moment, Rachel concludes, “You can research it and think about it—but neither will prepare you for actually doing it.”
The Boese family has discovered firsthand the hard work of foster care not only changes the lives of their placements but also deeply enriches their own lives as well. “People worry a lot about the impact foster parenting will have on their own children,” Rachel says, adding that her children are learning compassion and empathy in ways they otherwise would not have. “For us, we felt it was the very best way for our children to see the importance of loving and serving others. Our children have shared toys, bedrooms and clothes. For us, the experience has been overwhelmingly positive.”
Perhaps one of the most richly rewarding experiences for Rachel and her husband, Jonathan, has been working firsthand in helping foster children reintegrate back into their own homes.
While rehabilitation is the ultimate goal, saying good-bye to a child is one of the biggest inhibitors for families initially considering foster care. Jenny Kutz, director of communications at KVC Health Systems in Olathe, says this is the most common reservation she encounters. “If not you, then who?” she challenges those contemplating foster care to ask themselves. “Hurting children need loving families to provide them safety and stability. It is worth it for the foster parent to experience a little heartache at the end of foster care so that the child can experience safety and love during a difficult time.”
And the need is great. Within the five counties that comprise the Kansas side of the KC metro alone, more than 1,500 children and youth are within foster care due to abuse, neglect or other family challenges. The greatest need is for foster parents, like Jonathan and Rachel Boese, who have a heart to care for sibling groups, teenagers and children with special medical and behavioral needs. Kutz says the Boese family’s experience is not an isolated one. “Foster care not only changes a child’s life, it also changes your own. It gives you the opportunity to show a child the love and care they deserve while growing emotionally, mentally and spiritually as you teach life skills and give support.”
Many children in foster care will be safely reunited with their birth families once their parents overcome challenges and learn new skills. However, there are some children for whom it will never be safe to go home.
Lee’s Summit parents Andy and Kylie Ewing knew their family was not complete and pursued foster-to-adopt as a means to grow their family yet again. The family, which includes an adopted 4-year-old daughter, has grown three-fold this year as they welcomed a group of sisters into their home. The Ewings have learned nothing good comes easy. “It's all hard and it's all beautiful. Parenting through trauma is the hardest thing I’ve ever done,” admits Kylie. “It’s also the most rewarding thing we have ever done. To watch your children win battles they have struggled with—when they overcome fears they've had previously—are huge wins in our life. Little things like getting cleared from a particular therapy or support service are things we celebrate.”
For more information on how you can become a foster parent contact:
Midwest FosterAdopt Connect
18600 E. 37th Ter. S.
Independence, MO 64057
816.350.0215
KVC Behavioral HealthCare, Inc.
21350 W. 153rd St.
Olathe, KS 66101
913.322.4900
Lauren Greenlee is a freelance writer and mom of three boys. She lives in Olathe.