Increasing Independence
Increasing Independence: A guide to when your child is ready for more responsibility
Does your child want to help out in the everyday duties around the house? No matter the age, go ahead and let him. Even though you can vacuum the family room, empty the dishwasher and scrub the toilet in the amount of time it takes to show your 2-year-old how to put his socks away, it’s best to teach age-appropriate responsibilities now while he has the interest.
If your husband is like mine, he won’t jump at the chance to sweep the kitchen floor or gather cups from around the house, but your child will. You might need to let go of your normal way of doing things and realize that the way a toddler does this type of task is good enough for now.
Children feel proud of themselves when they have a task all their own that they learn to do well. Building this sense of accomplishment will motivate them to take on larger tasks as their skill sets improve.
Setting the table
Working with breakable items isn’t a task for a young child, but simple changes can turn setting the table into the ideal responsibility. Consider melamine plates from local Kansas City mom Lara Shelton’s company, La Plates (www.LaPlates.com). They are adorable, more environmentally friendly than paper plates, and your 2-year-old can drop them time and time again without any concern.
Packing the backpack
Children as early as preschool are ready for this task. Take a picture of all items that belong in the backpack and affix it above the hook where the backpack resides. Each night before bed, have your child check the list and ensure all items are ready to go for the following day. Since backpacks will be a part of their lives for many years to come, you will be happy to start them in this habit early.
Bathing
Start slow in allowing your child to bathe alone. Begin by letting your preschooler wash himself while you are in the bathroom to oversee the process. You can busy yourself with cleaning the sink to give your child the independence he may want (and mark a “to do” off your list!) but still remain close enough to ensure his safety. Draw a picture of your child on the shower wall with bath crayons and mark the areas he needs to remember to clean.
Once you are comfortable with his ability to get clean and stay safe, move on to allowing him to be alone in the bathroom. Keep the door open and stay within earshot. I ask my children to sing songs if they are bathing and I am out of the bathroom. As long as I can hear their voices, I know they are safe.
Breakfast
For the mornings that your children wake up before a rooster would even consider crowing, have granola bars waiting in the pantry on a child accessible shelf.
Our preschoolers grab those and a cup of milk already waiting for them on a low shelf in the fridge. They hop into our bed to watch cartoons while my husband and I grab a bit more shuteye. It makes a strong case for our dust buster later on but it is worth the extra moments in bed for us and the feeling of independence for our children.
Breakfasts utilizing heat sources are a different story. Around the age of 5, after some safety lessons and rules set forth by you, your child can probably start using the toaster. Pop-up toasters are safer than a toaster oven because the top of the food item can be grabbed versus reaching inside the heated area. Either way, keep wooden tongs next to the toaster so your child never has a chance to touch the heated coils.
Take some time to teach your child household tasks and you’ll be surprised at what he actually can and wants to do. And don’t worry--it is okay re-sweep the floors later. Just don’t let your child catch you!
Robin Gedman, a Prairie Village mom, lightens her load by having her children pitch in whenever she can.