Raise a Selfless Kid
After potty training, one of the hardest things to teach your children can be to think of others before themselves. Yet it is also one of the most important things parents can teach children. As they grow up, they need to understand the world does not revolve around them and to learn how to put others first.
Teach them to be giving.
- “Part of our obligation as a human being is to give back. This teaches them that life is about interaction with others and not about play, TV and games,” says Natalie Burger, Platte City mother of one. Giving is as simple as dropping money in the Salvation Army bucket to taking a meal to a family with a new baby.
Help them work in the community.
- “Volunteering helps kids see others needs ahead of their own. We live in such a kid-centric society that it's hard for kids to not feel like the world revolves around them. To show them important causes that we believe in and to do those things together reinforces a more healthy view of society,” says Lyndsey Perry, Liberty mother of three. Volunteering can be on a small or large scale and can be modified to be age-appropriate.
Discourage selfishness.
- “We are constantly talking to our kids about loving others more than themselves. Even when it comes to who gets the ‘prime’ seat in the van, the question we always ask them is, ‘What about putting your brother/sister in front of yourself?’ It's sometimes met with groans, but I feel like it's always putting their minds to thinking that everything isn't about them,” says Perry. Discouraging selfishness can range from teaching a child not to take the last cookie to letting someone else have the first turn at a game.
Lead by example.
- To truly teach selflessness, parents also need to practice what they preach. “Kids will only imitate what they see. They need to see their mom and dad volunteering their time, money and talents to people who are in need. They will catch the vision for giving if they see their parents already doing it,” says Amanda Jensen, Kearney mother of three. Jensen also adds, “I was told once to always let your kids see you giving when asked. I keep that in mind when I am asked to give to the Salvation Army kettle, or when I see the homeless person on the corner asking for money/help.”
6 Places to volunteer with a child
- Soup Kitchens This is a great way to spend family time together and help out the community at the same time.
- Homeless Shelters/Thrift Stores Clean out your closet and toy box and take your child with you when you drop off your items.
- Ronald McDonald House. Whether it is by serving a meal, making a blanket or providing items on their wish list, children are able to help other families.
- Church Buildings. Children can volunteer in the nursery with their parents or help clean the church building.
- Neighborhood Serve Day This is a great way for a child to work to better his/her community. Planting flowers or raking leaves are easy things for younger children to get started.
- At Home Making cards for those under the weather, dealing with a death or just needing a general pick-me-up message can hit home the messages of giving and kindness to others.
Jennifer Higgins is a free-lance writer from Kearney who is doing her best to raise two selfless children.