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The Pros and Cons of Room-Sharing

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Did you share a room growing up? Are you still angry with your younger sister for stealing your clothes? Or did you love the bonding experience it created? Do your kids share rooms? Let’s weigh the pros and cons of this major decision parents often have to make as they raise their children.

On the positive side, parents often say that their children are comforted when they have a sibling in the same room. They sleep better through thunderstorms and calm down more easily after bad dreams. They also may become better sleepers, as they will learn to sleep through noise. Alyson Collins, mother of three, says that one of her daughters used to be a poor sleeper but now, with her sister in the room, she sleeps much more soundly.

Many parents feel that rooming kids together strengthens relationships and makes sharing less of a hassle. Chelsea Hibbard, mother of four, says that her kids (who share a room) will often stay up a little bit later giggling and bonding. April Mick, also a mother of four, says her kids have a hard time remembering what belongs to each child, so they end up sharing almost everything. Another benefit is that sharing rooms prepares kids for when they’ll share space at camp or in college.

Having kids share a room also can make life easier for Mom! “All three kids clean one room together rather than making messes in three different rooms,” says Hibbard. Mick explains that having her children share a room keeps them from accumulating too much clutter (like knick-knacks) because of limited shelf space and storage. Organization is a must! Another pro for Mom and Dad is that sharing rooms requires fewer bedrooms. A smaller house works fine for a family with more than one child. Or, if there is an extra bedroom, it can be used as an office, guest room or exercise room.

Unfortunately, there are downsides to bunking up. For example, not all kids become better sleepers when sharing rooms. Children may have different sleep schedules and may keep each other up late at night or may wake each other up too early. This can become a greater issue if a younger child wakes up a school-aged sibling. The younger child may nap later on, but the school-aged child has a long day ahead of him without a nap and may become overly tired. Naptime also can be challenging if one child no longer naps but does go to her room for quiet time while a younger sibling does need to sleep. Hibbard puts her younger son in a guest room to nap while her older daughter plays in the bedroom quietly.

Also, conflicts are more likely to occur when kids share rooms. Some kids like a room very dark to sleep, while others like a nightlight. One child may like more alone time, while her sibling may be very social and have a hard time giving her space. Alyson Collins, mother of three, explains that she does not allow her daughters to ban each other from the room or kick the other one out. So if one of them needs some quiet time to decompress or be alone, she has to find an alternative space elsewhere in the house to do so. Also, sleepovers and play dates can get crowded and cause conflict when one child wants the room to herself with her friends, yet her siblings are in there as well.

There is no one-fits-all solution for the question of whether or not your children should share a room. With both options, kids will benefit and also face challenges. But isn’t that all a part of growing up anyway?

 

Olathe mom Karen Johnson has three children, ages 6, 4 and 2. She writes at The21stCenturySAHM.com.

 

Tips to promote success in room sharing:

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