Local Student Spreads Message against Bullying

Bullying in all of its various forms has unfortunately been evolving over time rather than dissolving. Within the past few years, with kids’ easy access to cell phones, the internet and social media, bullying has become a mainstream topic in the news and among parents, students and school administrators. However, one local teen is taking matters into her own hands in an effort to end bullying here in Kansas City.

Mikaela Carson, a senior at Shawnee Mission South High School, is a busy teen as a member of the Heritage and Acapella choirs, Repertory Theater, National Honor Society, and touring the country with the Colts Drum and Bugle Corps. Yet, she still dedicates a portion of her time to developing a program called ABLE, Anti Bullying Lifelines and Education. As Miss Kansas Teen, Carson holds a title that gives her a platform to speak to students at area middle schools on the subject of bullying in all its various forms. Mikaela says her goal is to spread the message that anyone can make a difference and even the smallest acts of respect and compassion can change lives.

A variety of behaviors contribute to all the different types of bullying. Carson hopes to raise awareness of the less-talked-about relational bullying, such as gossip, spreading rumors and ostracism. She also hopes to shed some light on how these behaviors are just as detrimental as the more traditional forms of bullying.

As a student herself, Carson connects well with her audiences, and through ABLE, they can find out how to make a difference themselves in efforts to stop bullying. So far, Carson has been very encouraged by the students’ attentiveness during her presentations, and her impact is showing.

Recently, at one of her presentations at Indian Woods Middle School, one student came up and shared her own experience with bullying and how she handled it. Hers was the first signed ABLE pledge, and quickly other students followed suit. Thrilled, Carson was able to get several hundred signed pledges that day. The pledges were then turned in to the students’ first-hour teachers and posted in the hallways. Eventually, Carson would like to incorporate parents and engage them in ABLE’s efforts as well.

But parents shouldn’t wait for programs like ABLE or for a phone call from school to take a stand against bullying. Here are some things you can do now:

Be a role model:

• Whether your child is being bullied or bullying, live the life you want your child to live.
• Show compassion in your everyday actions.
• Don’t gossip or talk about others negatively.
• Stand up for those in need of help.
• Children’s eyes are watching you, and their actions reflect what they see.

Stay involved and be the parent:

• Cyberbullying can be more extreme than any other form of bullying because of the far reach of the internet. It can be anonymous, and it mostly happens in the home where our kids should feel the safest.
• Only allow internet access when you are home and/or in a busy part of the home. Stick to your guns!
• Monitor kids’ social media and set up parameters. The more freedom they have, the higher the chances they will be involved in a bullying situation.
• Set up their email accounts with them and make sure you have their screen names and passwords. Also, check on the account regularly.
• Talk to your kids about what is appropriate to put online and to never respond to bullying online.
• Respect age limits on social media sites. The guidelines are in place for a reason, and to falsify your kids’ ages is sending the wrong message. Wait until they are more mature to handle the responsibility.

Have them sign the pledge:

• Visit Carson’s website or Facebook group page and print off the ABLE pledge. Have your children sign it at a family dinner and use it as a tool for family discussion. Let them know what you expect of them and what the consequences will be if they bully someone or fail to stand up for someone who is being bullied.
• You can find Carson on the web at www.ABLE-Antibullying.org or on Facebook at ABLE   Anti-bullying Lifelines and Education.
• Contact Mikaela Carson – Kansas Teen America 2012 at KansasTeenAmerica2012@yahoo.com  or on Facebook.
• Another great source for information on how to handle bullying is the National Crime Prevention Council: www.NCPC.org.

Hallie Sawyer is a writer from Overland Park with a daughter in middle school. Her daughter’s signed pledge is posted on their refrigerator door.